The Feast of Stephen
by Nuadha
Summary: After discovering that Koizumi's cousin has left him a cabin for the two days after Christmas, Haruhi declares that the SOS Brigade will have a party at this mountain retreat. Set after The Disappearance of Suzumiya Haruhi and before Snow Mountain Syndrome.


**Disclaimer:** I do not own _The Melancholy of_ _Suzumiya Haruhi_.

* * *

The bus trundled to a stop and I breathed a sigh of relief. The automatic doors of the bus opened and a wave of cool air washed over its interior.

"Last stop," yelled the driver from the front.

"We're here!"

I turned to see Haruhi, who had somehow managed to extricate herself from her window seat faster than I had undone my belt buckle, bouncing over a sleepy-eyed Asahina-san and landing on the floor of the bus with all the grace of an over-excited ferret. "SOS brigade, disembark!" she exclaimed as she marched off the bus.

"Shall we go?"

I looked sideways to see Koizumi with a bag on his lap and a smile on his face.

"Yeah, yeah", I answered, easing myself from my seat. I stood up and pulled two heavy sports bags down from the overhead bins. Both Koizumi, carrying a much lighter load myself I must note, and a yawning Asahina-san passed me by and exited the bus. When I finally managed to heave the bags over my shoulders I noticed Nagoto's presence beside me. She glanced down at the bags hanging from my shoulders and gave me what passed, from her, as a questioning look.

I shook my head. "No thanks, it's fine." The otherworldly girl had done enough for me lately.

She nodded in response and then wordlessly left the bus.

I sighed and pulled my bag out from underneath my seat.

"I haven't got all day here, kid."

"Sorry," I said, hurrying down the bus.

The driver grunted in acknowledgement as I stepped off the bus and into the cold air. The doors slammed shut behind me and the bus began to pull out. I glanced around and walked towards the large rock that Haruhi had decided to make herself Queen of.

"Kyon, you're so slow", she declared, hands on hips.

I raised an eyebrow at the pouting brigade leader. Maybe if you didn't make me carry everything I wouldn't be so slow.

She stuck her finger out at me. "That's irrelevant. Now," she continued, spinning to face the group in its entirety, "You all know why we're here, to make up for our lack of a Christmas Day celebration. Although we had a party on Christmas Eve, everybody knows that Christmas Eve is only worth one half of Christmas Day. However," she said, raising a finger as if she was about to imbue us with some mind-melting wisdom, "by celebrating the day after Christmas, St. Stephan's Day or Boxing Day, we will make up the deficit!"

That is the most idiotic thing that I've ever heard. Is the day before Christmas Eve worth one quarter of Christmas day and so on?

"And since Koizumi has graciously loaned us his cousin's mountain cabin we will be celebrating the day there." Haruhi made a sweeping gesture with her arm and pointed to a far-away wooden building on the hill beside the road. A series of old and broken stone steps wound their way up the frost-laden hillside and to the cabin.

I shifted my shoulders to distribute the weight of the sports bags and glanced over at Koizumi just as the smiling bastard began to walk up the steps after Haruhi. The meddler had casually mentioned at the Christmas Eve party that his so-called cousin had left him the cabin for the two days following Christmas. Haruhi, true to fashion, pounced on this faster than a starving cheetah and declared that the brigade would be going to this cabin for another party.

I waited until Asahin-san and Nagato had begun their ascent before starting my climb.

%%%%

I arrived at the cabin panting and sweating despite the cold. Somehow the hillside stairway had proven to be both longer and steeper than I had dreaded. I caught my breath as I waited for Koizumi to open the cabin door and looked the building up and down. The cabin featured the traditional western façade of two cross windows and a door complete with a heavy door-knocker. A stone chimney punctured the slate roof to the side, promising a fireplace.

A stiff breeze blew across the doorway, wiping away my sweat and leaving me frozen. The rest of the brigade shuddered as well. For a moment I swore that even Nagato tensed in that wind.

Asahina-san sneezed. A sound so cute has never echoed through those mountains! I offered her a tissue from the pack in the side-pocket of my bag.

"Ah... thank you, Kyon-kun." The time-traveller half-bowed as she walked over to me. She fought back another sneeze as she pulled the pack of tissues from my bag. "Thank you," she said again as she turned away to blow her nose.

A tapping noise drew my attention away from the heavenly girl and to Haruhi, who was close to stomping her foot against the decking in front of the cabin.

"How's the lock coming along, Koizumi?"

The annoyingly mysterious esper turned from the door and placed his hand on the back of his head. "I apologise, Suzumiya-san, but the lock appears to be jammed.

"Nonsense", declared Haruhi as she brushed Koizumi to one side. She tuned the key in one hand and pressed against the door with the other. Moments later, a loud click emanated from the door frame and the heavy wooden door swung to one side, its hinges protesting loudly all the way. "You see," announced Haruhi, "All you need is a little strength, eh, and your brigade chief has plenty of that!"

Koizumi beamed a smile at her. "I'll never doubt you, chief."

Sycophantic suck-up.

We crossed the threshold and spread out across the sitting area. I unburdened myself of my bags, coat and winter apparel to the side of the fireplace, where a pile of logs and old newspaper lay.

I glanced across to the kitchen area to see Asahina-san making tea with an old iron kettle. I smiled. Some things never change.

"Kyon-kun."

I turned my head to see Koizumi holding up a chess board. "A quick game perhaps."

I sighed inwardly. Some things never change. "Sure," I said and began to walk over to the small coffee table where the esper boy was setting up the game board but stopped short when Haruhi cut across me.

What!?

Haruhi picked up one of the sports bags which I had placed against the wall and opened it up. She drew something from the bag and quickly stood up and spun around, a broad smile on her face. This could only mean trouble.

"Gather around, brigade, your spectacular Chief had some awesome news for you."

Spectacular? Awesome? Oh no..

Haruhi waited until all four of the other brigade members stood around her in a semi-circle. "The day after Christmas day is known alternatively as Boxing Day or St. Stephan's Day. On Boxing Day, it is tradition that wealthy people and leaders would give their subordinates gifts-"

This might not turn out so bad after all.

"- However, on Stephan's Day it is tradition to dress up in a costume of the wren bird. Well", she said happily, "I have decided to combine both traditions." With a flourish she produced the garish garment from behind her back. "Ta-da!"

I looked the multicoloured bodysuit up and down, shades of green and yellow assaulting my eyes.

"And there's one for everyone." Haruhi dived back down into the bag. "And they come with hats too", she shouted, brandishing a feathered cap.

I'm not wearing that.

Haruhi scowled. "As your brigade chief I say that you are and that's final! Now, I'm going to get changed with the girls in the other room and when I come back you two better be changed." She glanced from me to Koizumi, who had amazingly kept his composure after being exposed to the costumes.

I sighed and Koizumi smiled.

"Good," said Haruhi, pushing past us and snatching up both Asahina-san and Nagato before heading into the other room.

I reiterated my earlier statement to Koizumi, who was in the process of removing the costumes from the sports bag. "I am not wearing that."

%%%%

I sipped my tea and glanced over to the kitchen where Asahina-san was busily chopping vegetables and tending to a steaming pot. Just down from her, Haruhi and Nagato were attempting to light a fire in the fireplace. Koizumi had offered to help, but Haruhi had refused.

"Your move."

I looked up at Koizumi, who smiled at me from beneath his wren hat.

"There not so bad really."

"Shut up." I pulled my wren hat back to keep it from falling over my eyes when I looked down at the board. I pushed a pawn forward and returned to watching Asahina-san work. The hat looked cute on her at least.

"Arrrgh!"

Haruhi struck a match once again and brought it to the newspaper which once again refused to catch fire. Nagato watched the proceedings intensely, seemingly fascinated by both the firewood and Haruhi's inability to light it on fire.

Haruhi struck another match and almost threw it and her hand into the fireplace. This time the newspaper caught fire and so did the sleeve of Haruhi's costume. She jumped back from the fireplace, her arm extended and began beating the small flames with her other arm. I leapt from my chair and pulled Haruhi further away from the fireplace. I grabbed a piece of cloth draped over the back of one of the chairs and wrapped it around Haruhi's wrist, smothering the flames.

The cabin was silent save for my and Haruhi's heavy breathing. She stared up a me, her eyes wide.

We stood that way for several moments. "Are you OK," I asked. Weren't you ever told not the play with matches?

I waited for an answer but none came.

"Haruhi-"

She shoved me aside and bounded towards the window. "I'm fine, Kyon," she said quickly, "but there's someone on the road outside."

I walked towards the window and peered through the fogged-up glass. "I don't see anybody."

"There was someone there," insisted Haruhi. "They were picking up branches off the road."

She spun around, waving her arms in excitement. "Perhaps it was a weary traveller foraging for fuel for a camp-fire!"

I doubt it.

"Bring me wine!"

"What? You swore off alcohol. We don't have any."

"OK, then bring me some of the logs from the pile beside the fire. We're going to find this poor soul and offer him some provisions."

What about our poor souls? "It's freezing outside and it just snowed."

"We'll be fine, Kyon. After all, what better way to celebrate Stephan's Day than to help a person in need?"

Koizumi spoke up, "Shall I prepare a bag, Suzumiya-san?"

Don't encourage her!

"No, Kyon will."

"What?!"

"You, Koizumi-kun will stay here to take care of her". She pointed a finger towards Asahina-san, who promptly shivered and retreated back into the kitchen area. "I mean, look at her!"

Asahina-san was practically hiding behind her apron at this point.

"With a body like that she'll be the favourite prey of any perverted predator for miles around!"

Asahina-san let out a small shriek, causing Nagato, who had not moved from the fireplace, to cast a near-quizzical look in her direction.

The only predator around here is you. "I'm not going out on this foolish errand with you."

Haruhi picked up the flash-light from the table beside the door. "As your brigade chief, you must follow me." With that she wretched the door open a walked outside.

"Haruhi!"

"Kyon."

I looked over my shoulder to see Koizumi holding out a bag filled with firewood.

I muttered a curse underneath my breath and grabbed the bag from his outstretched hands before following Haruhi outside. I shouted back into the cabin. "It's getting dark. Call me if we're not back in twenty minutes."

%%%%

The snow outside lay deep, crisp and even across the ground, covering everything but Haruhi's new footprints. I slung the bag on my back and followed the light of the flash-light and met Haruhi at the road.

"This is where he was", she pronounced, looking down on the nearly snow-covered road, save for some tire tracks. She then shone her flash-light towards a clearing in the trees to the side of the road. "There's a trail there. It leads up to a ridge a bit up the mountain."

"Why can't we just follow the road?"

"Because what sort of traveller would take the roads over a woodland trail?"

A sane one.

"Besides, it'll be dark soon and the roads will be even more dangerous then."

And a forest trail won't be dangerous?

"Come, Kyon, if we hurry we can catch him soon enough."

I sighed and followed the world-bending girl to the bottom of the trail. The things I do...

We trudged up the snowed out hill, meandering through trees and bushes. Haruhi hummed as we walked, some old Christmas tune about a King. About halfway towards the ridge I grew tired. That evil Koizumi had filled the bag to the brim with wood and it was weighing heavily on my back.

I had fallen back a few metres behind Haruhi and was about to pull the bag from my shoulders and empty it of some of the wood when my phone rang.

I reached into my coat pocket to answer and the wren hat fell over my eyes. I tripped over a stray root and tumbled into a nearby bush, my head impacting softly against a neighbouring tree.

"Kyon!"

My phones stopped ringing and I looked up with dazed eyes. Haruhi stood over me, wearing an uncharacteristic expression of concern.

"I'm OK," I said weakly.

"Give me your hand."

I raised my arm and Haruhi, in an amazing feat of physical strength, pulled both me and the bag of firewood out of the bush.

She glared at me. "Watch where you're going, Kyon, you could have been hurt."

I rubbed my hand against the back of my head. "Haruhi, I'm tired and it's almost dark. I can't walk any further. We should go back."

Haruhi looked away from me. "We're almost towards the ridge," she said, all thoughts of a mysterious traveller apparently gone, "We'll go there and come back down on the road."

"I told you I can't walk any further," I said, crossing my arms.

Haruhi turned and began walking towards the ridge. "Follow in my footprints."

"What will-"

I gave up on my question and began to follow the girl. I kept to her footprints, my larger feet erasing her prints as I tramped through the snow. As I walked I noticed a warmth finding its way up my legs, invigorating my muscle and prompting me to walk faster. By the time I had reached the ridge and Haruhi the tiredness had vanished from my body, as if it was a demon banished by some saint.

Haruhi clambered up onto the ridge and I followed. I stood on the snowy road and looked down the mountainside. I could see the smoke from the cabin rising above the trees in the fading light. I turned to Haruhi. "So, no weary travellers besides us anywhere around here?"

She bit her lower lip and seemed about to respond when a car came around the bend in the road.

We moved to the side of the road to allow the car to pass but it didn't, instead stopping a distance down from us. A door opened and a familiar green-haired girl bounded from it, somehow running down the road towards us without slipping.

"Haruhi-chan! Kyon-kun", exclaimed Tsuruya, skidding to a stop just before us. "It is megas-weird meeting you here! What are you two doing?"

"Koizumi invited us to his cousin's cabin just down the mountain for an after Christmas party."

She glanced at the wren hats both I and Haruhi wore and began laughing. After a few moments she stopped. "She great costumes for the party too I see! I wish I could see them all!"

"Where are you heading", I asked.

"To my families mountain villa", she answered. "But you two still haven't explained what you're doing halfway up the mountain."

Haruhi piped up, apparently annoyed at being excluded from the conversation, "I saw somebody picking up branches on the road below and thought that it was a weary traveller, so Kyon and I set out to give him aid."

Tsuruya laughed again. "Such an awesome idea, but I'm afraid that was Arakawa-san."

At the mention of the "butler's" name I glanced down at the idling car. What was he doing here?

He's driving me to the villa, but we've had to stop so many times because of all the large fallen branches on the road. A storm passed through here a few days ago and some of the less-used roads still aren't cleared, so that was probably him you saw picking up the branches."

"Oh," said Haruhi, clearly disappointed.

I stepped in. "Do you want to come to the party, Tsuruya?"

The girl smiled broadly. "Sure, do you want a lift to the cabin?"

Yes! "If you don't mind."

"Of course I don't, let's go!

Haruhi and I followed the energetic girl to the, rather expensive, car. She opened the door. "All aboard," she shouted, ushering us into the car.

I took the bag from my back and held it on my lap.

Tsuruya jumped into the car and closed the door. "Bring us down to the cabin we passed earlier, Arakawa-san."

She turned towards Haruhi and myself. "So, about those costumes."

%%%%

I sighed in relief as the warm air of the cabin flowed over me. Tsuruya bouncing across the floor to greet Asahina-san, Haruhi in hot pursuit.

Arakawa brought in a bag belonging to Tsuruya and left it beside the door before turning and heading back outside. As he left I caught sight of him giving a slight nod.

The door clicked shut and I turned to see Koizumi sitting beside the chess board, adjusting his wren hat.

He smiled at me. "We haven't finished our game yet, Kyon."

* * *

_A belated Merry Christmas to you all!_

_Bonus points to whoever picks up on the main reference for this short story.  
_


End file.
